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Instajournal: The out-of-towners

Once French Quarter Fest hits, so too does tourist fest. For the next couple months, curious, out-of-town souls will trek the cityscape. NolaVie recently ran a list of comments you’d never hear a true New Orleanian say. But what about the foreigners? What would you see a NOLA out-of-towner do?

Don’t get me wrong — we love having them here. However, as much as out-of-towners may enjoy brunching Elizabeth’s, boozing at Cooter’s and baring it all at the Country Club, if you’re a local, you can always spot ’em.

You know you’ve spotted a New Orleans tourist when:

Subject doesn’t realize that NOLA “1 o’clock” actually translates to “when I feel like showing up o’clock.”

t10

 

Subject hops on horse and carriage. Asks for route map.

t8

 

Subject’s dress facilitates amoeba functions.

t2

 

Those functions are tie-dyed.

etc phish

 

Subject’s drinks resemble a bag of Skittles.

t4

 

Selfies at the French Market.

t1

Selfies at Jackson Square.

t12

 

Subject substitutes a fish bowl for a go-cup.

t6

 

Subject needs a sign that reads “big ass beers” to affirm that its beer is, in fact, big.

t7

 

One word: Ponchos.

barkus7

 

Subject reenacts Noah’s Arc via segway.

t11

Or pedicab caravan.

t15

Subject cannot handle day drinking. Not. At. All.

t9

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