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Five reasons to be glad you're single on Valentine's Day

 

Valentine's Day is based on Lupercalia, which probably derived from lupus, or wolf, as in this ancient Roman brone in the Cleveland Museum of Art.Cleveland Museum of Art

Valentine's Day is based on Lupercalia, which probably derived from lupus, or wolf, as in this ancient Roman bronze in the Cleveland Museum of Art.

You're getting sick of dreary winter weather, sick of staying indoors with nothing but your Netflix-tuned laptop sitting on your lap to keep you warm at night, when suddenly, ever-so-nauseatingly, an entire day dedicated to highlighting your singleness is upon you. I’m talking, of course, about Valentine’s Day. 

But before you grab the XL bottle of wine you have sitting by your bed and start watching “The Way We Were,” take a minute to consider fivef reasons why you should be glad to be single THIS Valentine’s Day. 

Reason #1: The feast of St. Valentine was essentially the Christian renaming of a Roman pagan festival of Lupercalia. That festival had all of the eligible men sacrificing both a goat and a dog, skinning them, and using the skins to beat single women in the hopes of making them fertile. The women would line up for the chance to be beaten, and after a matchmaking lottery, would be forcefully “coupled” with the men for the night, and sometimes forever. (I think this is still celebrated at certain late-night spots in New Orleans?)  Who wants to celebrate that?

Reason #2: Because, let’s be honest, who wants to share a bottle of wine?

Reason #3: Valentine’s Day is on a FRIDAY. Bad for finding fancy dinner reservations, but great for hitting the town. All of your favorite late-night spots will be couple-free.  Everyone is fair game.

Snake and Jake's Christmas Club Lounge

Snake and Jake's Christmas Club Lounge

Reason #4: THESE AWESOME THINGS ARE GOING ON:

  • Lil’ Wayne is going be at JAX. You never know, maybe Weezy can teach you “How to Love” this Valentine’s Day.
  • Snake and Jake’s Christmas Club Lounge is celebrating 20 years. I know some of you have that New Orleans bucket list somewhere, and if this establishment isn’t on it, it should be.  Also, there will be cake and Drunk Food Truck.

Reason #5: Like the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy, it’s only important if you believe.

Tulane senior Maria Elena Smith is half Irish, half Italian and wholly New Orleanian. She is also an editorial intern at NolaVie. Email her [email protected]